A friend sent me the following
Last night I was sitting in the living room, talking to my wife about life
In-between, we talked about the idea of living or dying.
I told her, “Never let me live in a vegetative state, totally dependent on machines and liquids from a bottle. If you see me in that state, I want you to disconnect all the contraptions that are keeping me alive, I’d much rather die”.
My wife got up from the sofa with real look of admiration towards me and proceeded to disconnect the TV, the Cable, the Dish, the DVD, the Computer, the Cell Phone, the iPod, and the Xbox, and then went to the bar and threw away all my whisky, rum, gin, vodka & the beer from the fridge
I ALMOST DIED!!
1. Think about what you wish for
2. The female brain works on a different wavelength from the males
It is not the female but men also differ.
In my opinion, the husband had limited thinking while the wife had the full view of life.
So, she did the right thing
A few days ago I was having some work done at my local garage. A blonde came in and asked for a seven-hundred-ten.
We all looked at each other and another customer asked, ‘What is a seven-hundred-ten?’
She replied, ‘You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine, I have lost it and need a new one.’
She replied that she did not know exactly what it was, but this piece had always been there.
The mechanic gave her a piece of paper and a pen and asked her to draw what the piece looked like.
She drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote 710. He then took her over to a car just like hers which had its hood up and asked, ‘Is there a 710 on this car?’
She pointed and said, ‘Of course, its right there.’ The mechanic fainted.
If you’re not sure what a 710 is
I was out walking with my 4 year old daughter. She picked up something off the ground and started to put it in her mouth. I took the item away from her and I asked her not to do that.
“Why?” my daughter asked.
“Because it’s been laying outside, you don’t know where it’s been, it’s dirty and probably has germs” I replied.
At this point, my daughter looked at me with total admiration and asked, “Wow! How do you know all this stuff?”
“Uh,” I was thinking quickly, “All moms know this stuff. It’s on the Mummy Test. You have to know it, or they don’t let you be a Mummy.”
We walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but she was evidently pondering this new information.
“OH…I get it!” she beamed, “So if you don’t pass the test you have to be the daddy”
“Exactly” I replied back with a big smile on my face and joy in my heart.
Go by carefully lest you fall in to a trap